Most years I create a word or words I want to live by in that year. I don’t always master them but the intention is there to guide and remind me that is what I want to feel.

This year my words are Connection, Community and Collaboration (I couldn’t quite pick one). I realised that when I was happiest and feeling most fulfilled, I was feeling these feelings (connection and collaboration with others) and when I felt most uninspired and stuck these were the feelings that were absent. Essentially the words I choose for the year are often born out of a craving for the feelings I desire.

Have you ever noticed that when you feel like something is missing in your life you have a natural tendency to blame or complain about that thing like you have no control over it?

Here are some common ones I hear and some I have experienced:

• I can’t find love
• I don’t feel inspired by this place (town, country, city)
• I haven’t found my tribe
• I feel bored
• I feel uninspired by what I do
• I feel isolated from others/too much time on my own
• If feel so busy and overwhelmed

Last year I complained about feeling isolated in my work, doing too much remotely, not feeling enough face to face connection to others. I blamed where I lived, I blamed the city not having enough talks and inspirational events on, I blamed technology for a false sense of connectivity and then the penny dropped that if I wanted to feel connected and inspired and part of a community or a movement then I had to go out there and create it myself.

It is SO easy to sit in the space of complaining and inaction – the two go hand in hand like good old friends. It is painful for others who have to witness you being in this space and it is even more painful you living in the space. No one can solve your own craving but you.

Ask yourself right now – am I sitting in the space of complaining and inaction or am taking inspired action?

In the complaining and inaction space, every suggestion that comes your way is rebutted with an excuse for why that is not possible or too hard or been done before. That is why the best question is – how can I create what I am craving?

• If you’re not in a loving relationship or not feeling loved then do things that feeling loving for yourself or find a way to share your love with others. Give yourself the love you crave.
• If you feel isolated or disconnected organise something that brings people together (don’t wait for the invite or event to come to you). Host a gathering, join a shared office space or find ways for more connect in meaningful relationships each week.
• If you feel overwhelmed the business of life no, schedule your own time and space in your diary/calendar and start saying no more. Create strong boundaries that protect your energy and wellbeing. Strong self-worth = strong boundaries.

All of these examples sound so simple but so often we bypass the solution and makes things more complicated and over analysed them more than necessary.

This year I invite you to create your word (s) for the year and brainstorm on how you can personally bring these words to life for yourself. How can you feel more love? How can feel more connected? How can you feel inner peace? How can you feel inspired? (or whatever it is that you want for you).

You have all the answers if you are willing to ask yourself the questions and take inspired action and ownership.

If you haven’t done my yearly review exercise this might help you to clarify what you want to invite more of in the year ahead.

Simone